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Reviving a Marriage Strained by Depression

Reviving a Marriage Strained by Depression


Reviving a Marriage Strained by Depression


Depression is a powerful force that can wreak havoc on even the most resilient marriage. Many marriages have succumbed to it, leading to separation or divorce. While many would do their best to tough it out and support a depressed wife or husband, this can be a miserable life for both of you. Separation or divorce, however, need not be the only way out of a strained relationship. If depression is making your lives agonizing, do the most sensible thing: see a therapist to breathe life into yourself and thus your marriage.


The Impact of Being Married to a Depressed Spouse

“When one spouse is depressed, a marriage is depressed,” says Sari Harrar, author of “How to Deal with a Depressed Spouse.” The condition can erode your marriage as it becomes steeped in confusion, resentment, and isolation. Even if you have a sunny disposition, you can be dragged down by the powerful currents of depression.

Having a depressed spouse can mean being overwhelmed by responsibilities that you should be sharing—parenting, household chores, keeping a job/career, or running a business. It can also mean forgoing social, family, or work-related opportunities to stay home, and feeling isolated and lonely. In the long run, depression can deplete your energy, patience, and understanding, and even your love for your spouse.

If you don’t want to walk away from your depressed spouse, be prepared to help by thinking “outside of the box”.  Sustaining a marriage is not easy when depression grips your wife or husband. Helplessness and hopelessness are contagious; your inability to help your spouse can make you feel helpless and hopeless too. Living with these challenges on a day-to-day basis can make you vulnerable to drug and alcohol abuse or to depression itself.


Sustaining Your Marriage When You Are Depressed

Depression can change you and your perception of many things in life, including marriage. It can make you lose interest in things and people that used to matter to you, like your family. In the midst of sadness, anhedonia, and other negative emotions, you may not be able to care about what happens to your marriage or your children. With such bleakness in your life, how can you sustain your marriage?

Depression can deprive you of the feeling of love. You can have a cerebral understanding of the love you have for your spouse, but you are likely to feel emotionally disconnected from him/her. When you’re depressed, your mind also processes information differently, and you may misinterpret cues and circumstances. You can perceive people, including your spouse, as being critical of you when they are not.

This can all overwhelm your marriage. But, since the primary root of these marital difficulties is your depression, to save your marriage, it is logical to start overcoming it with the help of a professional therapist. 


The Value of Depression Therapy and Marriage Counseling

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, depression is a real emotional condition. It has symptoms that cannot just dissipate through willpower. Therapy is important for a depressed person to feel better and functional. Marriage counseling can also be vital for a “depressed marriage,” where one spouse is weighed down by the emotional condition, to help the couple reestablish their communication, resolve their issues, and revive their relationship.

Despite depression, a loving marriage is worth saving. Therapy can help the depressed spouse relieve the symptoms and regain normal functionality. Marriage counseling can help in healing the hurt that happens while one of you is depressed. If the depressed spouse participates in the process, a counselor independently contracted with Carolina Counseling Services — Pinehurst, NC, can help you both see your issues in a new light and develop strategies to cope with them.

Don’t walk away from your depressed spouse or give up your marriage because you are depressed; call CCS–Pinehurst instead. If depression is the main contributor to your marital issues, you can fortify and revive your marriage by seeking help from a therapist/counselor contracted with Carolina Counseling Services — Pinehurst, NC.


Serving Areas: Carolina Counseling Services – Pinehurst, NC

Counties: Moore county, NC, Lee County, Hoke County, Chatham County

Areas: Pinehurst NC, West End NC, Taylortown NC, Seven Lakes NC, Eagle Springs NC, Jackson Springs NC, Foxfire NC, Candor NC, Norman NC, Ellerbe NC, Rockingham NC

Zip Codes: 27281, 27376, 28315, 28347, 28350, 28373, 28374, 28387, 28388, 28394

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Easing Overwhelm in Marriage with Counseling

Kelly ErkenBrack, LCSW

Specializes in: (Ages 3+) Children, Teens, Adults, Couples and Families. Anxiety, Depression, Grief and Loss, Mood Disorders, Trauma, Adjustments and Life Transitions, ADHD, Behavioral Issues, Parenting, Relationship Concerns, Self Esteem
Insurance: BCBSTricare Prime/Select, Medicare and Cash
Credit Cards:  
Location: Pinehurst, NC

Robin Caswell, MSW, LCSW

Specializes in: (Ages 5+), Individuals, Adults, Anxiety, Depression, Grief, Loss, ADHD, ODD, Trauma/PTSD, LGBTQ, Self-Harm, Military Family Life, Mood Disorders, OCD, Phobias
Insurance: BCBS, Tricare, Medicare and Cash
Credit Cards:  
Location: Pinehurst, NC

Counseling Information

How Do I Set Up my FIRST Appointment?

  • Call: 910-420-3600 (Fastest way to schedule)
  • Text: (910) 308-3291 (Reply will be via phone)
  • Click here and use our Contact Form (You must include your phone number, because replies will only be made by telephone to ensure security/privacy)
  • Call or Text for your New Patient Appointment Anytime!
  • Appointment scheduling for NEW clients: Mon-Fri 8:30am-5pm
  • Established/Standing Appointments are made directly with your therapist!
  • Referrals: MOST beneficiaries do NOT need a Referral!

Other Contact Info

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Carolina Counseling Services – Pinehurst, NC

45 Dowd Circle Suite 5
PinehurstNC 28374

Our Mailing Address:

PO BOX 9909
Fayetteville, NC 28311